Good morning, Jim,
An obscure California camera company fronting for an organization seeking
world domination has mounted an unconscionable, unprovoked, and debilitating
attack on the Olympus List. Your mission, Jim, should you decide to accept
it, is to make them pay.
Your Team will gather in California in twenty-one days. You will gain
access to the subject property through air ducts from the adjacent offices,
which will be leased in the name of ?Acer Victorious, Inc.? This front
business will appear to be an inept one-hour photo lab, which will make it
indistinguishable from the multitude of others in this neighborhood. As you
know from watching movies, in California, all air ducts allow unimpeded
access through firewalls. After crawling through the ducts, your team will
quietly secure the premises and begin working. The Team computer expert
will perform the required task while other members will scour the site for
hostage OM gear.
The Team will escape from the rooftop aboard the Fuji Blimp commandeered by
the Team pilot, which will drop them off on a dinghy outside US territorial
waters. Top cover for the extraction will be provided by a squadron of RAF
Tornado fighter-bombers. Their cover is a previously scheduled Red Flag
exercise in Nevada. Team members will cause a one-state bias in the GPS
satellite constellation, which will explain the presence of the RAF in
California. The Tornadoes will not be issued bullets. Resistance to the
extraction is not expected, but you are authorized to use force if
necessary. We expect that you will throw massive Canikolta autofocus camera
bodies at opposing operatives.
All Team Members will be provided with air-tight alibis for the Mission ?
exposed film, taken with a 50 mm f/1.8 Zuiko on ADITL2 assignment.
And the Computer Expert?s assignment? While the Team is inside, the enemy
server will be upgraded to a beta version of Windows 2000, effectively
taking them out of action for the foreseeable future.
As always, should you or any member of your OM Force be captured or killed,
Mr. Maitani will disavow all knowledge. Good Luck, Jim!
Team members and specialties:
Hostage Recovery and Lens Testing ? Gary Reese
Top Cover Commander- Chris Barker
GPS Bias ? Warren Kato
Building Leasing and Comic Relief? Siddiq
Alibi Film Provision ? George Anderson
Computer Expert ? John Lind (Captain Blood)
Action Movie Token Aussie ? Wayne Harridge
Distracted Professorial Type ? Joel Wilcox
Mission Dramatic Documentarian ? Ken Norton
Team Pilot and Medic ? Jerry Lyles
Brilliant yet Beautiful Female Operatives ? Doris Fang and Scottish Jenna
Dinghy Captain ? George
and others as nominated by List Members.
Note to the humor-impaired and Microsoft Security Forces: This is a joke.
I do not advocate covert action armed or otherwise and I especially do not
advocate blimp-highjacking. Chunking Canikolta autofocus camera bodies is
OK.
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