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Re: [OM] Lens Element Wear

Subject: Re: [OM] Lens Element Wear
From: MorrisMini@xxxxxxx
Date: Sat, 29 Jan 2000 16:59:25 EST
Hi all,

<<To discharge the excessive photons from your older lenses *snip*  A 
blacklight is placed in front of the lenses and an infrared lamp placed 
behind. >>

Think people, think!  Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.  The 
many headed monster of lens element wear is an easily rectified optical 
aberration.  There is no need for fancy light sources and complicated 
procedures.  The solution is as close as your kitchen.

Simply place affected lenses on the center shelf of your refrigerator, being 
absolutely certain that the internal illumination source is switched off when 
the door is closed.  This may take some contortions and physical discomfort 
to ascertain by direct observation.  Be certain to remove all objects from 
the unit such as grapefruit and other spherical or ovoid foodstuffs which may 
contribute contaminating gravitational deviations.  Now, simply open and 
close the door of the appliance at one second intervals for one hour, being 
careful to allow the seal to block out all ambient light when compressed in 
its closed position.  The lowered temperature in the refrigerator will 
effectively slow down the photons as they are stripped from the surface of 
the glass by the strobe effect of the alternating negative/positive` light 
source.  The flow of air caused by the door opening and closing will actually 
flush the sluggish light particles out of the confined space of the insulated 
box and allow them to disperse harmlessly into the air to mix with the 
ambient light.

Hey, it doesn't take a rocket scientist, people.

-Tim Clark


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