Just got this from a friend of mine on the left coast..thought those of you
"over yonder" might enjoy..
Susan
To the citizens of the United States of America,
>
> In the light of your failure to elect anybody as President of the USA and
> thus to govern yourselves and, by extension, the free world, we hereby
give
> notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today.
>
> Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchial duties
over
> all states, commonwealths and other territories including New Jersey.
>
> To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, please comply with
> the following acts:
>
> 1. Look up "revocation" in the now official Oxford Dictionary ($75). Start
> spelling English words correctly.
>
> 2. Learn at least the first four lines of "God Save The Queen."
>
> 3. Start referring to "soccer" as football.
>
> 4. Declare war on Quebec and France.
>
> 5. Arrest Mel Gibson for treason.
>
> 6. Close down the NFL; learn to play rugby.
>
> 7. Enjoy warm flat beer and steak-and-kidney pudding. Train waitresses to
be
> more aggressive with customers and not to tell you their names before you
> eat.
>
> 8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday; it has been replaced with
> November 5th.
>
> 9. All members of this British Crown Dependency will be required to take
six
> weeks' holiday ("vacation") each year, and to observe statutory tea
breaks.
>
> 10. Driving on the left is now compulsory - recall all cars to effect the
> change immediately.
>
> 11.Report to our Consulate General in NY - M Wragg - for your new passport
> and job allocation.
>
> 12. Have Meg Ryan report to the Prince Andrew Bedchamber.
>
> 13. Add the Royal insignia to the top of the Washington Monument - and
the
> Queen's Christmas speeches to the Lincoln Memorial.
>
> 14. Stop referring to the World Series of Baseball and instead call it the
> National Series of USA, Cuba and Japan.
>
> Tax collectors from Her Majesty's government will be with you shortly to
> ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776, with
> penalties for tardiness).
>
> Thank you for your cooperation and have a nice day!
> ,,,
>
>
Susan Steele
Amherst, VA USA
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