Olympus-OM
[Top] [All Lists]

Re: [OM] For the pilots among us

Subject: Re: [OM] For the pilots among us
From: "Wiliam Wagenaar" <wiliam@xxxxxxxxx>
Date: Wed, 22 Feb 2012 22:42:52 +0100
Darn, Can't a pilot have any humor?

Wiliam

-----Original Message-----
From: Andrew Fildes [mailto:afildes@xxxxxxxxxxxxx] 
Sent: woensdag 22 februari 2012 21:57
To: Olympus Camera Discussion
Subject: Re: [OM] For the pilots among us

An example of the laconic humour that I like to think we do rather well.
Thanks. In case you think that the pilots are a dull lot, I heard a story
some years ago about a Quanta pilot bringing in a 747, turning to his
co-pilot and saying, "OK Fred, dangle the Dunlops". Unfortunately for him he
had a check pilot sitting behind him and was suspended for a month or two
for the irregular instruction. Apocryphal but I hope its true.
Andrew Fildes
afildes@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
www.soultheft.com




On 23/02/2012, at 7:23 AM, Wiliam Wagenaar wrote:

> 
> 
> Qantas Airlines: Repair Division 
> 
> In case you need a laugh:
> Remember, it takes a College Degree to fly a plane but only a High School
> Diploma to fix one.
> After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a 'Gripe Sheet'
> which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft.
> The mechanics correct the problems; document their repairs on the form,
and
> then pilots review the Gripe Sheets before the next flight.
> Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humour.
> Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' pilots
> (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by
> maintenance engineers.
> 
> P: Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement.
> S: Almost replaced left inside main tyre.
> 
> P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
> S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
> 
> P: Something loose in cockpit.
> S: Something tightened in cockpit.
> 
> P: Dead bugs on windshield.
> S: Live bugs on back-order. 
> 
> P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
> S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
> 
> P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
> S: Evidence removed.
> 
> P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
> S: DME volume set to more believable level.
> 
> P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
> S: That's what friction locks are for.
> 
> P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
> S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
> 
> P: Suspected crack in windshield.
> S: Suspect you're right.
> 
> P: Number 3 engine missing.
> S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
> 
> P: Aircraft handles funny............ (I love this one!)
> S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
> 
> P: Target radar hums.
> S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
> 
> P: Mouse in cockpit.
> S: Cat installed.
> 
> P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding
> on something with a hammer.
> S: Took hammer away from midget. 
> 
> 
> 
> -- 
> _________________________________________________________________
> Options: http://lists.thomasclausen.net/mailman/listinfo/olympus
> Archives: http://lists.thomasclausen.net/mailman/private/olympus/
> Themed Olympus Photo Exhibition: http://www.tope.nl/
> 
> 

-- 
_________________________________________________________________
Options: http://lists.thomasclausen.net/mailman/listinfo/olympus
Archives: http://lists.thomasclausen.net/mailman/private/olympus/
Themed Olympus Photo Exhibition: http://www.tope.nl/

-----
Geen virus gevonden in dit bericht.
Gecontroleerd door AVG - www.avg.com
Versie: 10.0.1424 / Virusdatabase: 2113/4825 - datum van uitgifte: 02/22/12

-- 
_________________________________________________________________
Options: http://lists.thomasclausen.net/mailman/listinfo/olympus
Archives: http://lists.thomasclausen.net/mailman/private/olympus/
Themed Olympus Photo Exhibition: http://www.tope.nl/

<Prev in Thread] Current Thread [Next in Thread>
Sponsored by Tako
Impressum | Datenschutz