Bob,
Your reason for laughter far exceeds my mail. Glad to hear Ben is recovering
so well.
Wiliam
-----Original Message-----
From: Bob Whitmire [mailto:bwhitmire@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx]
Sent: donderdag 23 februari 2012 2:28
To: Olympus Camera Discussion
Subject: Re: [OM] For the pilots among us
I'm sitting in my son's room in CT-ICU at Maine Medical Center laughing my
ass off. That might sound inappropriate, considering why and where I am, but
we've just been informed that Ben will be exiting ICU for step-down (rehab)
in the next day or two. That causes us to believe that he's officially out
of the woods, barring some freakish happenstance.
Thanks for the laughter!
--Bob
On Feb 22, 2012, at 3:23 PM, Wiliam Wagenaar wrote:
> Just received this message from my brother in law and thought you might
also
> have a laugh.
>
>
>
> Wiliam.
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Qantas Airlines: Repair Division
>
> In case you need a laugh:
> Remember, it takes a College Degree to fly a plane but only a High School
> Diploma to fix one.
> After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a 'Gripe Sheet'
> which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft.
> The mechanics correct the problems; document their repairs on the form,
and
> then pilots review the Gripe Sheets before the next flight.
> Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humour.
> Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' pilots
> (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by
> maintenance engineers.
>
> P: Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement.
> S: Almost replaced left inside main tyre.
>
> P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
> S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
>
> P: Something loose in cockpit.
> S: Something tightened in cockpit.
>
> P: Dead bugs on windshield.
> S: Live bugs on back-order.
>
> P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
> S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
>
> P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
> S: Evidence removed.
>
> P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
> S: DME volume set to more believable level.
>
> P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
> S: That's what friction locks are for.
>
> P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
> S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
>
> P: Suspected crack in windshield.
> S: Suspect you're right.
>
> P: Number 3 engine missing.
> S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
>
> P: Aircraft handles funny............ (I love this one!)
> S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
>
> P: Target radar hums.
> S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
>
> P: Mouse in cockpit.
> S: Cat installed.
>
> P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding
> on something with a hammer.
> S: Took hammer away from midget.
--
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