Joan and I have an agreement. (Me and Joan? <g>) The one who goes first is
cremated, and the survivor takes the ashes to scatter someplace the survivor
wants to go, not the deceased. For a long time I was sure I would be scattered
in Switzerland. Now, I'm not so sure. For the moment, Joan is going to the
standing stones at Lochbuie, on the Isle of Mull.
As for visiting graves, I never do it, unless they are the graves of strangers
located in some picturesque place. Puttered around a lot of cemeteries in
Scotland. Have wandered through more than a few here in Maine. And, of course,
if you go to Boston, cemetery wandering is required.
My paternal grandfather is buried where the afternoon shadow of Thomas Wolfe's
angel (as in Look Homeward Angel) falls across his grave. He was a tyrant, and
a giant in my life. He died while I was in the army. When I got home, I walked
the few miles to the cemetery where he is buried and sat and smoked a joint on
his grave. More or less made my peace with him that day. He was dead and I
wasn't, and there was a monumental weight removed from my psyche.
Does it count as irony that the shadow of Wolfe's angel falls across my
grandfather's grave when, as a defense attorney, he destroyed the credibility
of Thomas Wolfe as a witness during a murder trial in Asheville, NC? (Wolfe is
not buried beneath the angel. It was sculpted by Wolfe's father, a stonecutter
in Asheville.)
--Bob Whitmire
Certified Neanderthal
On Jan 7, 2014, at 1:23 AM, Chris Barker wrote:
> A woodland burial for me. I don't want the waste of energy of a crematorium.
>
> However, there is a lot to be said for a permanent grave; I visit my father's
> when I can.
--
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