Good story Chris and a cool photo. I just about needed a pee bag at my
office chair laughing at your description. Perhaps a suggestion for your
next long flight in a small plane; something used often in the hospital on
older, immobile men: the condom catheter. It is a heavy duty condom with a
built-in tube. The condom grabs the willie like a toothless bulldog so no
leaks. When you are done just roll it off. My poor Uncle has used one for
years with great success (back injury from helicopter crash off carrier
flight deck back in the '60's; rotor clipped something and into the drink
she went; lucky to be alive).
Congratulations to the List! We've managed to cover both forms of human
elimination in one day. Things can only improve.
Charlie
On Tue, Dec 8, 2009 at 1:30 PM, Chris Barker <ftog@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
> For the aircraft which have it, Charles, it's just a toilet. In smaller,
> faster machines it's a pee bag or something like "relief system". I've only
> used it once, in the F16.
>
> Story: switch off now if you get bored easily.
>
> My first ever long-range trip, using a USAF Reserves KC-135 to get 5 F16s
> from MacDill AFB, FL to NAS Miramar near San Diego. I felt the need to pee
> after a couple of hours, perhaps over Texas. So I broke the membrane on a
> pee bag and tried to use it. But the little fighter's seat is inclined at
> 30deg (vs the 13deg of most other ejection seats) and I'm not well-endowed
> enough to make the flow from leaning backwards like that. So I have to
> unstrap and lean forward a bit. But also it's cold in the cockpit and a
> limp dick becomes quite difficult to find. So you have to think warm
> thoughts to make it all happen!
>
> What is also difficult is holding formation with a tanker while trying to
> find your willie in a flight suit strapped into an ejection seat. So I
> wandered away from the formation and almost couldn't find them when I had
> finished my business.
>
> But that was preferable to a USAF colleague's experience. Before we
> departed MacDill he showed me a pee tube affair that he had rigged up: a
> funnel over said willie, tube-connected to a pee bag in his lower flight
> suit pocket. Trouble was it leaked ... and he got out of his super-cool F16
> on the ramp at Fightertown USA with a long wet patch on his flight suit leg
> and crotch, risking great scorn from our Naval hosts. Oh, the ignominy!
>
> And this is a photo of me in a D-model (2-seater) just before departing
> Miramar. I think it was taken with an Olympus Infinity Twin, bought in San
> Diego a few days before.
>
> http://gallery.me.com/zuiko#100053
>
> Chris
>
> On 8 Dec 2009, at 18:09, Charles Geilfuss wrote:
>
> > Chris what do the fly boys call it? I've never heard it called anything
> in
> > the big jets. In the small ones I suppose its a diaper or "just wait".?!
> >
> > Charlie
>
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